Day 19-23

Eeek I let time get away and didn't get around to blogging about all these days. Oh well....life does go on. So the short cliff notes on what these days are about.....

19~ Love is Impossible.....I was suppose to look back over the previous dares and see if any were very hard to do and reflect on why. If so ask God for his strength and grace and where I stand with him.

20~ Love is Jesus Christ.....Dare to take God at His word. Dare to trust Jesus Christ for his salvation. Really let Him into my life and hand everything over to him. Know that all things are possible if I truly believe in Him.

21~ Love is Satisfied in God....Be intentional about making time to pray. Really start a habit of picking up that Bible and leaning into His words. He does show his love and promises for us through His writing. By doing this will only make my walk Grow with Him.

22~ Love is Faithful....Learning Love is a choice not a feeling. I was dared to choose today to be committed to love even if my husband has lost most of his interest in receiving it. I let him know how much he means to me and how unconditional it is....no strings attached and no expectations. I let him know that even if he doesn't chose to love me in return...that my love for him will always be.

23~ Love always Protects.....So that leads up to today's lesson I'm learning about. Marriage is made up of many things that include happiness, sadness, great achievements and hard failures. We have so many influences in our day to day lives that we need to protect each other and ourselves from. Like watching too much TV, or spending too much time on the computer, working long hours taking away from family time. We really need to learn how to find that balance that will only allow our relationship to grow. We also need to make sure we keep our eyes on the road so to speak....opposite sex relationships can really undermine your marriage if your not careful and be on guard at all times. Satan will get you if he can and will weasel his way in those cracks if you are not careful.
We also need to protect our spouse by making sure we don't talk bad about them in public. Their secrets are our secrets and we must do everything possible to make sure them feel secure in our relationship so they will feel the love we have for them come out to its fullest. Love hides the faults of others. It covers their shame. Then we move onto parasites, which can latch on to either one of us and suck the life out of the marriage. So this is the part about addictions....we saw it in the movie Fireproof...where he was addicted to pornography. It says in the book that if you love your spouse, you must destroy any addiction that has your heart. If you don't, it will destroy you.
Man this really hit me on something that I never thought was an addiction.....but its been stealing my heart....I tend when I get something in my mind to really really dwell and obsess about it....it will take up my mind hours upon hours. I don't really know what you call this addiction...OCD?! But I do know that it is stealing the joy from me. I need to really pay attention to myself when these occasions arise. Learn that I need to stop and pray about it...and just hand it over to God. Then go about my business with something else. Everything will work out in Gods timing. He has a plan for everything. I just need to be strong and learn to trust. With each and everydays worth of practice it Will become easier and easier.

So this is where I'm at. Still ok. Still having faith. Still believing in the best outcome that God wants me to have. Its been kinda weird because Ive been in my own little world lately. Not really talking to many about this. Ive been really leaning into God this time. This is not anyone elses problem and I do not want to unload my crap on top of the crap that is going on in their lives. That is really not fair. Plus after the last weeks lessons....I really don't want to talk bad about my husband to anyone. He is my other half, and talking bad about him is talking bad about me. Its just not right. Yes he is not perfect...but I am not perfect either. If I truly want to learn what God is trying to teach me then I really need to listen to his lessons. I feel funny sometimes talking to myself, or listening to my voice inside my head reassuring me and cheering me on. But I know these are just conversations with God and its all good.

Well tomorrows lesson will be Love vs. Lust.....The world is passing aways, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever. -1 John 2:17